Night at the Museum Karaoke
by Dragonwing251
Summary: I have joined the museum for a week end to sing karaoke. M/M parings, F/M parings. I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING!
1. Welcome to the Club Now

**Crash!**

 **Larry: What the!**

 **Teddy: What is happening!**

 **Dragon: Hello everyone!**

 **Ahkmenrah: Who are you?**

 **Dragon: My name is Dragonwing251, but you can call me Dragon.**

 **Jedediah: So ma'am, why are we here?**

 **Dragon: You are here to sing some songs, and NIGHT PUT AHK'S TABLET DOWN NOW!**

 **Night: You are no fun.**

 **Dragon: I don't care. Give Ahk his tablet back.**

 **Night: Fine.**

 **Dragon: Anyway up singing first is Nick singing 'Welcome to the Club Now'**

 **Nick: Okay.**

* * *

 **Nick Daley singing 'Welcome to the club now by DJ Manian**

It's alright, get ready for the night  
Of your life  
Stars will shine so bright  
They say, we're dancin' the stress away  
Hey Hey

This beat gets underneath your feet  
Right now  
Together we will meet  
This place will blow your mind away  
Hey Hey

Welcome to the club now!  
Gonna pump it up now!  
This is an emergency!  
Music is my galaxy!

Welcome to the club now! Everybody up now!  
We've got it goin' on!  
Till the break of dawn!

Welcome to the club now!  
Gonna pump it up now!  
This is an emergency!  
Music is my galaxy!

Welcome to the club now!  
Everybody's up now!  
We've got it goin' on!  
Till the break of dawn!

So put the record on, on, on, on, on!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
So put the record on!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
P-P-P-Put the record o-o-o-o-on!  
To the club now!

{To the club now}

Right now, we're standin' here in line  
Open up the door Mr. Frankenstein  
Cuz we're here to dance the night away  
Hey Hey

Welcome to the club now!  
Gonna pump it up now!  
This is an emergency!  
Music is my galaxy!

Welcome to the club now! Everybody up now!  
We've got it goin' on!  
Till the break of dawn!

Welcome to the club now!  
Gonna pump it up now!  
This is an emergency!  
Music is my galaxy!

Welcome to the club now!  
Everybody's up now!  
We've got it goin' on!  
Till the break of dawn!

So put the record on, on, on, on, on!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
So put the record on!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!

Operator!

O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
To the club now!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!

JUMP!

O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
To the club now!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!  
O-O-O-O-On!

Welcome to the club now!  
Gonna pump it up now!  
This is an emergency!  
Music is my galaxy!

Welcome to the club now!  
Everybody's up now!  
We've got it goin' on!  
Till the break of dawn!

So put the record on!

* * *

 **Everyone was gaping at him**

 **Larry: Nick where did you learn to sing like that!?**

 **Nick: Um.. here's the thing. I'm an immortal.**

 **Everyone: WHAT!**

 **Ahk: Really, who?**

 **Nick: My real name is Harry Potter and I'm the master of Death.**

 **Ahk: Okay.**

 **Larry: That's all you have to say! OKAY!**

 **Dragon: Okay, so Nick lied to you. But how would you feel if you were immortal, and say all of your loved one's die around you?**

 **Larry: Probably the same.**

 **Dragon: Good now up next is... NIGHT I MEAN IT! IF YOU DON'T GIVE AHK IS TABLET BACK NOW, I WILL MAKE YOU LEAVE THE ROOM!**

 **Night: You wouldn't!**

 **Dragon: Try me!**

 **Night: Fine. Don't blow a gasket.**

 **Dragon: As I was saying, up next is Sacagawea singing 'Colors of the Wind' and you have to sing it to Teddy.**

 **Sac: Okay.**

* * *

 **Sacagawea singing 'Colors of the wind form Pocahontas **

You think I'm an ignorant savage  
And you've been so many places  
I guess it must be so  
But still I cannot see  
If the savage one is me  
How can there be so much that you don't know  
You don't know

You think you own whatever land you land on  
The Earth is just a dead thing you can claim  
But I know every rock and tree and creature  
Has a life, has a spirit, has a name

You think the only people who are people  
Are the people who look and think like you  
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger  
You'll learn things you never knew, you never knew

Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon  
Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned  
Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains  
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind  
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind

Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest  
Come taste the sun sweet berries of the Earth  
Come roll in all the riches all around you  
And for once, never wonder what they're worth

The rainstorm and the river are my brothers  
The heron and the otter are my friends  
And we are all connected to each other  
In a circle, in a hoop that never ends

How high will the sycamore grow  
If you cut it down, then you'll never know  
And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon  
For whether we are white or copper skinned  
We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains  
We need to paint with all the colors of the wind

You can own the Earth and still  
All you'll own is Earth until  
You can paint with all the colors of the wind

* * *

 **Everyone clapped politely**

 **Larry: Good job** **Sacagawea.**

 **Sac: That you, Larry.**

 **Dragon: Okay that's all for now**

 **All: See does not own anything**

* * *

Song **Welcome to the Club Now** by DJ Manian

Song **Colors of the wind** from Pocahontas

Please Review

Suggestions would be great

I don't own anything


	2. Bad Romance and One Jump Ahead

**Dragon: Hello everyone!**

 **All: Hi!**

 **Dragon: So up next is Larry singing 'Bad Romance'!**

 **Larry: NO!  
**

 **Dragon: Yes! And you have sing it to Ahk.**

 **Larry and Ahk: WHAT! NO!**

 **Dragon: Yes, now stop complaining and sing.**

 **Larry: Fine.**

* * *

 **Larry Daley singing 'Bad Romance' by Lady Gaga**

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance  
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!  
Ro mah ro-mah-mah  
Gaga oh-la-la!  
Want your bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!  
Ro mah ro-mah-mah  
Gaga ooh-la-la!  
Want your bad romance

I want your ugly  
I want your disease  
I want your everything  
As long as it's free  
I want your love  
Love-love-love  
I want your love

I want your drama  
The touch of your hand  
I want your leather studded kiss in the sand  
I want your love  
Love-love-love, I want your love (Love-love-love, I want your love)

You know that I want you  
And you know that I need you  
I want it bad  
Your bad romance

I want your love and  
I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance  
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!)  
I want your love and  
All your lovers revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh! Oh-oh-ooh-oh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!  
Ro mah ro-mah-mah  
Gaga ooh-la-la!  
Want your bad romance

I want your horror  
I want your design  
'Cause you're a criminal  
As long as your mine  
I want your love  
Love-love-love  
I want your love

I want your psycho, your vertigo shtick  
Want you in my rear window  
Baby you're sick, I want your love  
Love-love-love, I want your love (Love-love-love, I want your love)

You know that I want you  
And you know that I need you  
I want it bad, bad romance

I want your love and  
I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance  
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh!)  
I want your love and  
All your lovers revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh! Oh-oh-ooh-oh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh! Oh-oh-ooh-oh-oh-oh!  
Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!  
Ro mah ro-mah-mah  
Gaga ooh-la-la!  
Want your bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!  
Ro mah ro-mah-mah  
Gaga oh-la-la!  
Want your bad romance

Walk, walk fashion baby, work it move that bitch crazy  
Walk-walk fashion baby, work it move that bitch crazy  
Walk-walk fashion baby, work it move that bitch crazy  
Walk-walk passion baby, work it I'm a free bitch baby

I want your love  
And I want your revenge  
I want your love  
I don't wanna be friends

(J'veux ton amour et je veux ta revanche j'veux ton amour)  
I don't wanna be friends, I don't wanna be friends  
I don't wanna be friends, I don't wanna be friends  
Want your bad romance (caught in a bad romance) want your bad romance

I want your love and  
I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance  
(Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh!)  
I want your love and  
All your lovers revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh! Want your bad romance  
Caught in a bad romance  
Want your bad romance  
Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh! Want your bad romance  
Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!  
Ro mah ro-mah-mah  
Gaga ooh-la-la!  
Want your bad romance

* * *

 **Everyone: Hahahah!**

 **Larry: Yea, yea. Laugh it up.**

 **Nick/Harry: Come on Dad, you know it was funny.**

 **Larry: You called me dad.**

 **Nick/Harry: So, you are my dad.**

 **Larry: But you said your name was Harry Potter?**

 **Nick/Harry: So that is true, you treat me like your son, so therefore you are my dad.**

 **Night: Not that this isn't touching but can we continue?**

 **Dragon: Night be quiet, or you get to sing next.**

 **Night: NO! I'm good.**

 **Dragon: Good. Now up next is Ahk singing 'One Jump Ahead' from the move Aladdin. Oh, Nick, Sac, and Teddy you are going to help me out a little.**

 **Ahk: Okay.**

* * *

 **Ahk singing 'One Jump Ahead' from Aladdin**

[Ahk:] Gotta keep  
One jump ahead of the breadline  
One swing ahead of the sword  
I steal only what I can't afford  
( That's Everything! )

One jump ahead of the lawmen  
That's all, and that's no joke  
These guys don't appreciate I'm broke

[Nick:] Riffraff! Street rat! Scoundrel! Take that!

[Ahk:] Just a little snack, guys  
[Nick:] Rip him open, take it back, guys  
[Ahk:] I can take a hint, gotta face the facts  
You're my only friend, Abu!  
[Nick:] Who?  
Oh it's sad, Aladdin's hit the bottom.  
He's become a one-man rise in crime  
I'd blame parents except he hasn't got 'em  
[Ahk:] Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat  
Tell you all about it when I got the time!

One jump ahead of the slowpokes  
One skip ahead of my doom  
Next time gonna use a nom de plume  
One jump ahead of the hitmen  
One hit ahead of the flock  
I think I'll take a stroll around the block

[Nick:] Stop, thief! Vandal! Outrage! Scandal!

[Ahk:] Let's not be too hasty  
[Sac:] Still I think he's rather tasty  
[Ahk:] Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat  
Otherwise we'd get along  
[Nick:] Wrong!

[Aladdin:] One jump ahead of the hoofbeats  
[ Teddy:] Vandal!  
One hop ahead of the hump  
[Teddy:] Street rat!  
One trick ahead of disaster  
[Teddy:] Scoundrel!  
They're quick, but I'm much faster  
[Teddy:] Take that!  
Here goes, better throw my hand in  
Wish me happy landin'  
All I gotta do is jump

* * *

 **All: Hahaha (The four joined them)**

 **Dragon: Okay that is all for now!**

 **Everyone: She Dose not own anything!**

* * *

Song **Bad Romance** by Lady Gaga

Song **One Jump Ahead** from Aladdin

Please Review

Suggestions would be great


	3. Savages and I'll Make a Man Out of You

**Dragon: And we are back.**

 **Nick/Harry: So who is going to sing next.**

 **Dragon: Night why don't you announce who is next.**

 **Night: Okay.** **Up next is Ahk and Teddy singing 'Savages' from Pocahontas.**

 **Ahk: But I already sang.**

 **Dragon: Sorry Ahk but it's on the list.**

 **Ahk and Teddy: Okay.**

 **Dragon: Sac you are also in this.**

 **Sac: Okay.**

* * *

 **Ahk and Teddy singing 'Savages' from Pocahontas**

 _Teddy:_

What can you expect  
From filthy little heathens?  
Here's what you get when races are divers  
Their skins are hellish red  
They're only good when dead  
They're vermin, as I said  
And worse

They're savages! Savages!  
Barely even human  
Savages! Savages!  
Drive them from our shore!  
They're not like you and me  
Which means they must be evil  
We must sound the drums of war!  
They're savages! Savages!  
Dirty shrieking devils!  
Now we sound the drums of war!

 _Ahk:_

This is what we feared  
The paleface is a demon  
The only thing they feel at all is greed  
Beneath that milky hide  
There's emptiness inside  
I wonder if they even bleed

They're savages! Savages!  
Barely even human  
Savages! Savages!  
Killers at the core  
They're different from us  
Which means they can't be trusted  
We must sound the drums of war  
They're savages! Savages!  
First we deal with this one  
Then we sound the drums of war

Savages! Savages!  
Let's get a few, men!  
Savages! Savages!  
Now it's up to you, men!  
Savages! Savages!  
Barely even human!  
Now we sound the drums of war!

 _Teddy:_

This will be the day  
Let's go men!  
This will be the morning  
We will see them dying in the dust

 _Sac:_

I don't know what I can do  
Still I know I've got to try  
(Now we make 'em pay)  
Eagle, help my feet to fly  
(Now without a warning)  
Mountain, help my heart be great  
(Now we leave 'em blood and bone and dust)  
Spirits of the earth and sky  
(It's them or us)  
Please don't let it be too late  
(They're just a bunch of filthy, stinking savages)

Savages! Savages!  
Demon  
Devil  
Savages! Savages!  
What are we waiting for  
Destroy their evil race until there's not a trace left  
We will sound the drums of war  
(How loud are the drums of war)  
Now we sound the drums of war

Now we see what comes of trying to be chums  
Now we sound the drums of...  
(Is the death of all I love carried in the drumming of...)  
War!

* * *

 **Everyone was looking confused, but clapped anyway.**

 **Dragon: Okay, now I am bringing in some other people. So do not attack them, please.**

 **Bright light**

 **Batman(BM): Where are we?**

 **Dragon: Well Batman, I have brought you here to sing some songs.**

 **Robyn(Rob): Okay so what are we singing?**

 **Night: The next song is I'll make a man out of you.**

 **Dragon: The People singing it will be Lancelot.**

 **Lancelot(Lance): Yes!**

 **Dragon: Nick, Red Arrow(RA), Artemis, and Aquaman(AM).**

 **All: Okay.**

 **Dragon: Oh and Attila do not take this personally, it is just a song for a movie.**

 **Attila: (Nods')**

* * *

 **Lance, Nick, RA, Artemis, and AM singing I'll make a man out of you**

Lance:

Let's get down to business, to defeat the Huns  
Did they send me daughters, when I asked for sons?  
You're the saddest bunch I ever met  
But you can bet before we're through  
Mister, I'll make a man out of you

Tranquil as a forest but on fire within  
Once you find your center, you are sure to win  
You're a spineless, pale, pathetic lot  
And you haven't got a clue  
Somehow I'll make a man out of you

Nick:

I'm never gonna catch my breath

RA:

Say goodbye to those who knew me

AM:

Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym

Nick:

This guy's got 'em scared to death

Artemis:

Hope he doesn't see right through me

RA:

Now I really wish that I knew how to swim

Lancelot:

Be a man

RA, Artemis, AM, and Nick:

We must be swift as the coursing river  
Be a man  
With all the force of a great typhoon  
Be a man  
With all the strength of a raging fire  
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon

Time is racing toward us till the Huns arrive  
Heed my every order and you might survive  
You're unsuited for the rage of war  
So pack up, go home, you're through  
How could I make a man out of you?

Be a man  
We must be swift as the coursing river  
Be a man  
With all the force of a great typhoon  
Be a man  
With all the strength of a raging fire  
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon

Be a man  
We must be swift as the coursing river  
Be a man  
With all the force of a great typhoon  
Be a man  
With all the strength of a raging fire  
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon

* * *

 **Silence**

 **Larry: What was that?!**

 **Night: That was a song Larry.**

 **Dragon: Okay that is all for now.**

 **Everyone: Please review!**

* * *

Song **Savages** Pocahontas

Song **I'll Make a Man Out of You** from Mulan

Suggestions would be great!

* * *

Sorry I haven't updated in a while but I had a lot of homework.


	4. Writings on the Wall and Dark Side

**Dragon: All right everyone up next is Larry singing Writings on the Wall.**

 **Larry: Okay.**

* * *

 **Larry Daley singing _Writings on the Wall_ by Sam Smith**

I've been here before  
But always hit the floor  
I've spent a lifetime running  
And I always get away  
But with you I'm feeling something  
That makes me want to stay

I'm prepared for this  
I never shoot to miss  
But I feel like a storm is coming  
If I'm gonna make it through the day  
Then there's no more use in running  
This is something I gotta face

If I risk it all  
Could you break my fall?

How do I live? How do I breathe?  
When you're not here I'm suffocating  
I want to feel love, run through my blood  
Tell me is this where I give it all up?  
For you I have to risk it all  
'Cause the writing's on the wall

A million shards of glass  
That haunt me from my past  
As the stars begin to gather  
And the light begins to fade  
When all hope begins to shatter  
Know that I won't be afraid

If I risk it all  
Could you break my fall?

How do I live? How do I breathe?  
When you're not here I'm suffocating  
I want to feel love, run through my blood  
Tell me is this where I give it all up?  
For you I have to risk it all  
'Cause the writing's on the wall

The writing's on the wall

How do I live? How do I breathe?  
When you're not here I'm suffocating  
I want to feel love, run through my blood  
Tell me is this where I give it all up?  
How do I live? How do I breathe?  
When you're not here I'm suffocating  
I want to feel love, run through my blood  
Tell me is this where I give it all up?  
For you I have to risk it all  
'Cause the writing's on the wall

* * *

 **Everyone was** **silent**

 **Nick: Okay what was that!?**

 **Night: Well that was a song, Nick.**

 **Dragon: All right everyone up next is Artemis!**

 **Artemis: Okay what I'm I singing?**

 **Dragon: Well Artemis you are singing Dark Side by Kelly Clarkson. NIGHT GIVE BATMAN BACK HIS UTILITY BELT, BEFORE I MAKE YOU SING!**

 **Night: NO, no! I'll be good, HERE Batman.**

 **Dragon: Artemis, please sing before I strangle Night.**

 **Artemis: Okay. (runs up to the stage)**

* * *

 **Artemis singing _Dark Side_ by Kelly Clarkson**

There's a place that I know  
It's not pretty there and few have ever gone  
If I show it to you now  
Will it make you run away

Or will you stay  
Even if it hurts  
Even if I try to push you out  
Will you return?  
And remind me who I really am  
Please remind me who I really am

Everybody's got a dark side  
Do you love me?  
Can you love mine?  
Nobody's a picture perfect  
But we're worth it  
You know that we're worth it  
Will you love me?  
Even with my dark side?

Like a diamond  
From black dust  
It's hard to know  
It can become  
If you give up  
So don't give up on me  
Please remind me who I really am

Everybody's got a dark side  
Do you love me?  
Can you love mine?  
Nobody's a picture perfect  
But we're worth it  
You know that we're worth it  
Will you love me?  
Even with my dark side?

Don't run away  
Don't run away  
Just tell me that you will stay  
Promise me you will stay  
Don't run away  
Don't run away  
Just promise me you will stay  
Promise me you will stay

Will you love me? Ohh  
Everybody's got a dark side  
Do you love me?  
Can you love mine?  
Nobody's a picture perfect  
But we're worth it  
You know that we're worth it  
Will you love me?  
Even with my dark side?

* * *

 **THUD!**

 **Everyone turned to Kid Flash (KF) who fainted on the floor.**

 **Rob: Okay that was unexpected.**

 **Aqualad (AL): Yes, it was Robyn. Miss Dragon who is singing next?**

 **Dragon: I'm glad you asked Aqualad because up next is Uther Pendragon aka Rupert Giles singing Standing in the Way.**

 **Suddenly a bright light appeared.**

* * *

Song **Writings on the Wall** by Sam Smith

Song **Dark Side** by Kelly Clarkson

Please review


	5. Standing in the Way

**When the light ended here stood men in armor, with red cloaks, along with two girls in dresses.**

 **Arthur Pendragon (AP): Where are we? (going for his sword)**

 **Night: You are here to sing some songs.**

 **Merlyn: Why?**

 **Dragon: Because some people want to see some of you guys singing. I'm just writing the story**

 **Uther Pendragon/Giles (UP or Giles): fine who singing?**

 **Dragon: (giggling): You are.**

 **UP: What!**

 **Dragon: Yes, one moment.**

 **Bright light**

 **Buffy: Giles!**

 **UP: Hello, Buffy.**

 **Dragon: Anyway Uther you are singing _Standing in the Way_ when you the others where under the demons spell.**

 **UP: Okay.**

 **Night: But you have to sing it to Buffy.**

 **UP: Fine.**

* * *

 **Uther Pendragon singing _Standing in the Way_** **from Buffy the Vampire Slayer**

You're not ready for the world outside  
You keep pretending, but you just can't hide  
I know I said that I'd be standing by your side  
But I...

Your path's unbeaten and it's all uphill  
And you can meet it, but you never will  
And I'm the reason that you're standing still  
But I...

I wish I could say the right words to lead you through this land  
Wish I could play the father and take you by the hand  
Wish I could stay here  
But now I understand  
I'm standing in the way

The cries around you, you don't hear at all  
'Cuz you know I'm here to take that call  
So you just lie there when you should be standing tall  
But I...

I wish I could lay your arms down  
And let you rest at last  
Wish I could slay your demons  
But now that time has passed  
Wish I could stay here, your stalwart, standing fast  
But I'm standing in the way  
I'm just standing in the way

* * *

 **Silence**

 **AP: Father what was that?**

 **UP: Not now Arthur.**

 **Dragon: Okay Now is... NIGHT GIVE ARTHUR BACK HIS SWORD RIGTH NOW OR YOU WILL SING! NO IFS, ANDS, OR BUTS ABOUT IT!**

 **Night: But!**

 **Dragon: NOW!**

 **Night: Fine.**

 **Dragon storms off to cool off**

 **Night: Anyway up next is the Doctor, Donna Noble, and Jack Harkness.**

 **Portal opens and three people drop out**

 **10th Doctor: Where are we?**

 **Night: You are here to sing some songs.**

 **Donna Noble (DN): Okay what are we singing?**

 **Night: You are singing _The Ballad of Russell and Julie_.**

 **All three: Okay**

* * *

 **The 10th Doctor, Donna Noble, and Jack Harkness singing _The Ballad of Russell and Julie_**

Julie and Russell sat one night.  
Russell sparked up a Marlboro Light.  
Julie's eyes were all ablaze,  
As Russell tried to shun her gaze.  
He knew the look, he knew the score;  
It seemed more manic than before.  
Russell cringed in fear and dread  
As Julie pulled him near and said:

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
I've had a really good idea.  
We'll re-vamp, make more camp  
A sci-fi show from yester-year.  
I've had banter with Tranter.  
Your written word will be hailed in the ming mong mantra.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

But he said…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
You're asking far too much of me.  
I'm harasssed, embarassed;  
I've watched the show since I was three.  
Don't choose me, don't use me,  
My mother sent a note to say you must excuse me.  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

So she said…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
Make a brand new Doctor Who.  
We've got Chris in, all's missing  
Is a sidekick and an all-Welsh crew.  
It's not silly to ask Billie.  
We'll film in every quarry from here to Caerphilly.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

Ooh, then he said…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
The pressure of the BBC.  
I must e-mail some young male  
To alleviate the stress on me.  
I can't block out, please lock out,  
Images of Johnny B getting his cock out.  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

She replied…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
Phil okayed my offer to produce.  
We'll get Trac to take flack  
When he lets his raging temper loose.  
My decision to use your vision  
Will make the show the best thing on the television.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

And he squawked…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
Chris is giving up his role.  
No Time Lord? Oh good Lord,  
How we're gonna fill this role?  
It's too complex, we're all wrecks.  
My brain is overflowing with a bloody Dalek.  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

She excitedly said…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
We'll get another Time Lord in.  
Don't sweat it, you can't let it  
Make you sad and maudlin.  
It's not over, and moreover,  
We'll get the lovely fellow in from Casanova.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

And he yelled…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
I really think that I can't cope.  
More re-writes, no respite-  
I think I've given up all hope.  
It'll get canned, it'll be panned.  
Lou says there's no costumes in the whole of England.  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

Then she proclaimed…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
Martha Jones is Freema Agyeman.  
We'll bring back Captain Jack  
To fight against the Cybermen.  
We'll cast a great Master,  
He can plunge the planet into global disaster.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

And he screamed…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
You've cast Australia's pop princess.  
It's madness, my sadness  
Will make this episode a mess.  
My panic is manic-  
The uproar when I kill her off on the Titanic!  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

And she expelled…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
The Doctor needs a brand new mate.  
Don't linger, go ginger.  
I'm gonna bring back Catherine Tate.  
I wanna, you're gonna,  
Reunite the Doctor with the fabulous Donna.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

He punctuated…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
I've got obsessed with E4's Skins.  
Writer's block. Please don't mock,  
It takes my mind off other things.  
It's so lame,  
I must blame dirty thoughts I'm having about Midshipman Frame.  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

Excitedly she said…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
To film abroad will get my vote.  
I promise Ed Thomas can't bring Ancient Rome to Upper Boat.  
It's D-Day on Pompeii;  
The forums will be buzzing on Outpost Gallifrey.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

And he roared…

I can't do it!  
I can't do it!  
The studio in Rome's ablaze.  
On fire, it's dire-  
How the hell are you not phased?  
It's mental. Be gentle.  
They say the cause of fire was a Berkley Menthol.  
I can't do it!  
I can't do it tonight!

So she roared…

Let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
We've got kids back behind settees.  
Our mission, ambition,  
Was a show for all the families.  
we should try as our goodbye  
A hassle-free excursion to sunny Dubai.  
Let's do it!  
Let's do it tonight!

But he shouted…

Oh, let's do it!  
Let's do it!  
I feel like I've been set free.  
I won't sweat it, now Moffat  
Is taking up the reins from me.  
I can't wait, it's just great-  
I've got a cracking way for Dave to regenerate.  
Let's do it!  
let's do it tonight!

Guess what?

They did it!  
They did it!  
They opened up the TARDIS door.  
They're terrific, prolific.  
Made it better than it was before!  
A 'thank you' from your crew.  
We crown you both the King and Queen of Doctor Who.  
You did it!  
You did it tonight!

* * *

 **Everyone clapped**

 **Dragon walked back in**

 **Dragon: Okay that's it for this chapter**

 **Everyone: BEY!**

* * *

Song **Standing in the Way** from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Song **The Ballad of Russell and Julie** can be found on YouTube

Please review


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